Sunday, July 24, 2005

How to Raise a Superman

I preached today in the Encounter (English) service on the topic "How to Raise a Superman: Lessons from Jonathan & Martha Kent" This is a summary of that message. The mp3 file can be heard on the www.fbcchome.org website.

He was an alien living among ordinary men and wome. Born on a faraway planet that revolved around a red dwarf star, he was the only survivor of a great though doomed advanced civilization. Sent to earth as a baby infant, his kryptonian physiology allowed his cells to absorb the yellow rays of our sun, transforming him into a living solar battery. The power that was stored within him would eventually manifest itself in superhuman abilities of speed, strength, flight, x-ray vision, heat vision, and a host of other abilities. But in all the mythology surrounding Superman, the accounts that I find most interesting are the ones concerning his earthly parents. The reason I find Jonathan and Martha Kent, also known as Pa and Ma Kent, fascinating are because they are the single most important influences in the story.

There have been a plethora of differing versions of Superman's story through the years—different incarnations or origins as presented in novels, comics, television, and movies. It seems that each new writer who takes over the mantle of writing Superman stories feels the urge to rewrite the story according to a fresh perspective. In one of the recent revisits to Superman's origins, the writers of Superman revealed that Jor-El, Superman's genetic father, when he sent him to earth, intended other designs for the baby's fate. Jor-El already knew that baby Kal-El because of the yellow sun and earth's lesser gravity would gain superhuman powers that would make him all-powerful and nearly invincible. His hope, or rather his plan, was for Kal-El to take over the earth by force and become its ruler. But we all know what happened: Instead of ruling the earth, Superman decided to be known as Clark Kent instead; he adopted the values and teachings of his earthly parents as his own, and chose to use his powers to fight the battle for truth, justice, and liberty. HE HAD TWO BENTS IN HIM—A GOOD ONE AND AN EVIL ONE. AND HE CHOSE TO FOLLOW THE GOOD.

What does this have to do with the Bible or with us as Christians? Like the fictional superman, Scripture teaches us that all children are born with natural bents—both good and bad—and God has entrusted a special role to us parents in guiding our children. Everyone wants the best for their children, and in order to see how you can raise your children to be the Super individual God wants them to be, we must go to the Scriptures. In this message, we shall visit two of the Wisdom books—Psalms and Proverbs.

Psalm 127:3-4
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. As arrows are in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. (The Amplified Bible)

The Kents found the baby and acknowledge that Clark was a gift. As parents, the first step in parenting is to acknowledge our children as gifs from God. No child is an accidental birth in God's eyes. They are gifts from the Giver, intended for a purpose (the arrow analogy, but more on that later). Acknowledge and thank God for the gift of your child. Your child is given to you for a purpose, to aim true and release later.

Psalm 139:13-14
For You did form my inward parts; You did knit me together in my mother's womb. I will confess and praise You for You are fearful and wonderful and for the awful wonder of my birth! Wonderful are Your works, and that my inner self knows right well. (The Amplified Bible)

Pa and Ma Kent understood the baby had a destiny, a noble purpose, and they took the time to instill ideals and values reflecting that purpose.

Each baby from conception is formed by God. Emmanuel (the Lord is with us), every step in the growth and development of the embryonic process. He formed our cells, muscles, tissues, facial features, and yes, even the occasional deformities and imperfections. Not only is He involved in the process of conception and birth, but verse 16 of Psalm 139 declares that He is involved in each and every day of our life after birth. Just as God so diligently and wonderfully fashions us, He also diligently and wonderfully plans a purpose for us. (Romans 8:29 adds to this by saying that He purposed His intention for us even before conception, before the creation of the world.)

While most parents would be willing to dedicate their child for God's blessing, few seem to grasp that this involves surrendering the child to God's plan and purpose. Parents sometimes wish they could live vicariously through their offspring, see their children accomplish dreams of mom and dad. This would be a mistake though for we would be playing God.

Durng the previous two weeks, I made a dog puppet, Fluffy. The puppet was birthed from my own design and pattern. I sewed it together, and when I presented the puppet to the children at church, I had in mind a list of do's and don'ts, and rules regarding the use of the puppet. I had a plan and purpose for the puppet I had created. And for Fluffy to fulfill his true purpose, Fluffy has to submit to my plan. If Fluffy rebels against me, I withdraw my hand, and he loses his life and meaning.

Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go [and in keeping with his individual gift or bent], and when he is old he will not depart from it. (The Amplified Bible)

Adapt the training of your child so that it is in keeping with your child's individual gift or bent, the God-given characteristics given to your child at birth, and when maturity comes, he will not leave the training he or she receives.

According to Charles Swindoll, parents often commit two common mistakes in parenting. One is to raise a child in the same way they were raised. This kind of parenting is what I call "default parenting." You do what comes naturally (what you yourself went through) when you don't plan and purpose before God your parenting scheme. The second mistake is to raise different children in exactly the same way. Children are different, even siblings. The parent's task is to discover the child's unique design—gifts, strengths, weaknesses, temperament, intelligence, etc.—and from there infer the best way to mold the child's unique design in line with God's purpose.

Psalm 51:5
Behold, I was brought forth in [a state of] iniquity ; my mother was sinful who conceived me [and I too am sinful.] (The Amplified Bible)
For I was born a sinner—yes, from the moment my mother conceived me. (New Living Translation)

Then, of course, the EVIL BENT also exists. The sinful nature, passed on from Adam to every human child, also known as the "want-to" to sin, the "want-to" to choose our own way. The only cure for a defective heart is a new one—only available in Christ. There is no other way to solve the EVIL BENT but God's solution through the death of Christ on the cross for our sins.

In summary, the Scriptures teaches us the following basics on parenting and our children:


  • Children are God's gift—Thank Him for them

  • Children have God's divine purpose—Submit to Him

  • Children have God-given bents—Discover and cooperate with their individual bents
  • Children have sinful bent—Lead them to Christ
John Schneider, the actor who plays Jonathan Kent on the TV series Smallville, had this to say about his purpose in portraying Pa Kent: he wants people to“think about what's happening in their own house. Think about what's happening in their own neighborhood, their own family. If I can make somebody think, then that's 90% of the work.”
My heart's desire is that parents will take time to think and plan their parenting, submitting to God's plan and purpose, get to know how God has wired their kids, and in this way, bring up a child, who can glorify God in the way God planned it out in His book.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Rocky Mountain Travel


Last week our family took our annual road trip/ vacation. This time we covered approximately 2658 miles through four states, two nights camping in one national park, stops in three cities (Denver & Colorado Springs in CO, and Arlington, TX), one Children's Museum (Denver), three waterfalls, 6 audio CD's of Star Trek Nemesis (this one is for me), and 42 episodes of Adventures in Odyssey.

Anne and Joy says the most memorable part of the trip was our return home. We drove from Colorado Springs toward Kansas, and on the way thru Dorothy's home state, "a tornado was chasing us." Frank had been driving for a while and was planning for Betty to take over, but every time we stopped for gas and a pit stop to change drivers, the storm caught up with us, and so Frank continued driving. He didn't want Betty to drive in a storm. Only when we were finally headed south on I-35 did Betty take over.

The truth is, we had strong winds and lots of rain chasing us but the twister was reportedly at least a hundred miles south of us, near Stafford, Kansas. I remember Stafford because Joy, at a pit stop in a McDonald's in Kansas, pointed out that we must be close to Sugar Land, TX, because she saw Stafford on the map.

Another highlight of the Colorado Springs visit was going to Whits End at Focus on the Family. Joy and Anne got to record an episode of Adventures in Odyssey. We have the CD, now if only we can figure out how to put an mp3 file on a blog. Betty commented that "the girls had great radio voices." Frank literally bumped into Mr. Whitaker in the hallway, and our family had a picture taken with Eugene. Though this is our second trip to Focus on the Family in three years, we do want to go back again. They're building a Chronicles of Narnia exhibit room.

Frank learned on this trip that sometimes the best deals are found in the simplest places. While searching for a hotel to stay, he discovered that the travel coupon books you pick up in the fastfood restaurants along the highway actually had the best discount for our stay at the Fairfield Inn in Colorado Springs.